One of the side effects of pornography has been its impact on women and on female sexuality. A 2023 Barna study has shown that the overall percentage of women using porn has increased 5% over the previous eight years. While men’s epidemic levels may be difficult to compete with, women’s porn consumption is becoming an increasing problem of its own. Two out of a hundred women use porn daily, 8 out of a hundred weekly, and 12 out of a hundred once or twice a month.
When sex is reserved for a wife and husband, it is exclusive and protected. Yet porn removes the sacred sexuality from the bedroom and offers it for public consumption and arousal. Jesus warns, in the severest terms, against the power of lust and the unrestrained imagination to crave what doesn’t belong to you:
Matthew 5:27–30
The Apostle Paul commands the Corinthians to “flee from sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18), not run towards it out of curiosity.
Falling into a Pit
When asked to provide reasons for using porn, women cite sexual arousal almost as frequently as men. Other top motivators include curiosity, setting the mood for a partner, and getting creative ideas, all of which are just as concerning.
Increasingly, the American population is looking to pornography to learn about sex, as if porn offered some kind of normalcy standard for the public. It does not. The porn industry is driven to create content that viewers are downloading. The content demanded is increasingly violent, abusive, and boundaryless. It degrades people in the worst ways. If porn is America’s educator, it is one dark rabbit hole that misrepresents God’s beautiful gift of intimacy between a husband and wife.
Women may fall into porn for different reasons than men, and may not be as widely addicted as men, but they can become just as enslaved or just as confused as men. Our families and church communities need to be increasingly vigilant in protecting our younger girls, as we are in protecting our boys.
Collateral Damage
If women are increasingly ensnared in porn, they are also increasingly damaged by a loved one’s use of it. As of 2023, 42% of men report using porn at least weekly, and another 15% report monthly. Women’s responses to their loved one’s addiction are telling:
- 44% of the women felt their partner wasn’t attracted to them (31% felt like their partner didn’t care about them).
- 38% said unrealistic expectations were placed on them.
- 38% felt a decline in their self-esteem as a result.
- 33% felt unsure whether their relationship was even healthy anymore.
- Women are three times more likely than men to say that their partner’s addiction made them feel like they had been betrayed.
When men are addicted to porn, women end up paying the price. Trust, intimacy, and protection are eroded.
Sexual intimacy creates a union between two people. The vulnerability requires commitment, trust, and protection. Porn produces the exact opposite. Porn breeds sin, confusion, secrecy, shame, lust, comparison, competition, abuse, and self-gain. That shroud of darkness hangs over the male users and their female lovers as well as the female users and their significant others.
We don’t have to accept this reality. If you’re struggling with or maybe even addicted to porn, you can get free from it. Read our article Addicted to Porn. Petra Church also offers programs such as Men’s Conquer Series for men and Sexual Integrity for women. If you’ve experienced sexual trauma or abuse, your innocence can be restored; read Restoring Sexual Innocence.
Freedom is worth the effort. God called His original design of sexual union between husband and wife “very good.” It’s still worth protecting today. The mutual love, freedom, and joy that come from enjoying and serving one another are beautiful gifts that spouses give and that create the foundation for healthier families.
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