Marriage is the metaphor God uses to depict His own self-sharing love. It is a covenant commitment; a commitment to radical union. In ancient Israel, adultery was considered a capital offense; that’s how sacred marriage was. Yet, by Jesus’ era, a “divorce-on-demand” interpretation of the law had become common. Similarly, in the United States, just thirty years ago divorce was still a seemingly unpardonable sin in the church. Today divorce has become an accepted norm in our society (interpreting the data). Even so, we know from Malachi 2:13–16 how much divorce grieves the heart of the Lord. How can two people who are made one: “bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh” be torn apart?
Surprisingly, some Jewish legal scholars in Jesus’ day had developed an extremely permissive view of divorce. In Matthew 19:1–12 and Matthew 5:31–32, we observe Jesus interacting with His contemporaries on this matter. Jumping into that conversation is like jumping onto a train moving at full speed. Though the 21st-century listener misses the broader conversation and context that preceded Jesus’ words, we learn a few things about Jesus’ own conclusions on divorce and remarriage.
Jesus’ Restrictive View of Divorce
Matthew has preserved Jesus’ opinion on the contested “divorce-on-demand” interpretation held by Rabbi Hillel (Read in the Mishnah here). Hillel exploited the vagueness of a Hebrew phrase, “an indecent thing” in the NIV, to justify expansive grounds for divorce [1] (Deuteronomy 24:1). When the Pharisee (scholar of the law) asked Jesus, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause…,” the Pharisee is asking about Hillel’s use of this phrase. It was the “any cause” clause, the “indecent thing” that they were asking Jesus’ opinion on (we’ll return to this below).
Jesus’ answer in the Gospel of Matthew is not an expansive, topical discussion of divorce and remarriage; it was crafted to refute the liberal interpretation of a single phrase. The broader category of divorce law included more reasons for divorce than just adultery. And since Jesus, as well as His contemporaries, upheld the Mosaic Law (Matthew 5:17–20), we presume all of the legal experts universally agreed on the other biblical grounds for divorce. Hence, in 1 Corinthians 7:15, the Apostle Paul could justify divorce for reasons of abandonment that Jesus didn’t mention. Jesus was only giving an opinion for the “any cause” clause.
Requirements of Marriage and Grounds for Divorce?
Case law in both Exodus 21:10–11 and Deuteronomy 24:1–4 indicates four valid reasons divorce was permitted. Case law extracts universal principles from specific cases to interpret precedent and apply them to future legal decisions. We read of a case in Exodus 21:10–11:
If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights. If he does not provide her with these three things, she is to go free, without any payment of money.
After discarding the peculiarities of polygamy, three acceptable reasons for divorce were established from this case: depriving a spouse (woman) of food, clothing, and conjugal love. Adultery had already been specified in Exodus 20:14. These four pledges were paralleled in the vows exchanged by Jewish couples at their wedding: the promise to feed, clothe, exchange conjugal love with, and be exclusively faithful to each other. Violating these basic commitments provided grounds for divorce.
God reminded the nation of Israel in Ezekiel 16:8–19 how He had provided His part of the covenant, but they had unfaithfully offered their food (v.19), clothing (v.16–18), and love (v.15) to other idols. Adultery is one of several indicators of a broken marital pledge. Neglect and abuse, though not specifically mentioned, are understood as neglecting the necessary marital support, food and clothes, or necessary physical affection that produces children—conjugal love. The Mosaic Law maintained the victim’s right to terminate a marital union that had been violated. The victim retained the right to divorce or forgive, but they were not obligated to remain in a harmful or unfaithful situation. Neither was Jesus requiring victims of abuse to remain maritally entangled. The emphasis of Jesus’ divorce ruling was to stop people from creating victims of adultery, not to enslave people to abusive or harmful relationships.
Another legal detail that Jesus and the rabbis referred to was a “certificate of divorce” (Matthew 19:7; Deuteronomy 24:1). The liberal rabbis were exploiting the permission granted by Moses. Jesus, by contrast, was challenging their interpretive ruling. The certificate of divorce was intended to protect vulnerable women from a man’s capricious divorce efforts—since only men in that culture could initiate a divorce. The divorce certificate ensured legal closure to their relationship, which enabled the woman to recover her dowry [2] and remarry without fear of the first husband returning and taking her house and kids. The requirement for a certificate didn’t imply that divorce was an acceptable practice; rather, it ensured that when divorce happened, there was a “clean end.” [3] As we see with much of the Mosaic Law, the ideals of God’s loving character were applied into a legislative framework that accommodated for human sin and brokenness.
Protecting the Marital Covenant, Not Trapping Victims
In keeping with Moses’ intent for the “certificate of divorce,” Jesus offered legal protection to vulnerable women when he said, “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” Note the congruency to His verdict in Matthew 5:32: “anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery.” Jesus was protecting women from unjustified divorce by husbands using the “any cause” clause.
Jesus’ ruling on the “any cause” clause was that Hillel’s legal opinion violated God’s design for marital union. Jesus does this by synthesizing two important texts from Genesis 1:27 and 2:24, which you can read in Matthew 19:4–6, then finishes with a legal verdict: “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Jesus is effectively saying, you should not divorce for “any cause.” As much as is within your power, don’t violate your covenant commitment to your spouse—committed union is the Creator’s intent!
Jesus was trying to stop the committing of adultery, not stigmatize or entrap victims of adultery or abuse. One scholar observed that Jesus wasn’t even interested in the legal rationale for divorce. Instead, He used the opportunity to teach about marriage. [4] Jesus’ answer, in brief, was that Hillel was wrong and divorcing to get remarried is adultery. The “divorce-on-demand” interpretation had given people liberty to justify their adultery, a violation of the Creator’s intent! Jesus’ final comments about remarriage in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 are then linked to the divorcee’s motivation. Divorcing so that you can remarry is wrong; remarriage, per se, is not necessarily wrong.
The spouse who has cheated on their partner has sinned, not the victim who then files for divorce. In this sense, Christians shouldn’t be the cause of divorce, but sometimes we have to accept that it happens. The spouse who abuses or neglects their partner has sinned. Don’t blame the victim of abuse who then files for divorce. The Bible never punishes the victims of adultery for initiating a legal divorce. The legal finality of a ruptured marriage is only the recognition that a marriage has already been broken.
Moving Forward, Remarriage?
While divorce is never God’s intended outcome for a marriage, in reality, marital sin and abuse devastate trust and loving relationships. Divorce is a reflection of our selfishness. It is always deeply personal and deeply tragic. God hates divorce because of the damage it does to people, families, and communities. Divorce is not inevitable. And there is a strong case to be made about the role of forgiveness, counseling, and rebuilding what was lost. But that also requires the willingness of two people to rebuild together.
Not all marriages make it. And remarriage is another messy question that families and pastors have to grapple with. Remarriage needs to be a conversation within the counsel of family, church community, and spiritual authority. There is a lot to think about. I will cite one of the paragraphs from a policy statement that Lester Zimmerman, the leader of our network of churches, has written:
Many people come to us with a broken past and on their second or third marriage. Some were unbelievers, and some were Christians when their marriages failed. We choose to be a place of new beginnings in God’s redemptive grace and forgiveness. Divorce is not the unpardonable sin. For those who have divorced and remarried without a biblical reason, we look for acknowledgment of their sin and genuine repentance. We accept them on this basis into full membership and fellowship. We encourage them to begin anew where they are at and sin no more. (John 8:11; 1 Corinthians 7:20)
Conclusion
Jesus’ commitment to marriage was tenacious. He was more interested in building healthy marriages than giving people a license for divorce. He held people accountable to the oaths they made in God’s name and prohibited them from rationalizing the adultery in their hearts. This indicates that Jesus’ view of marriage is more comprehensive and demanding than our modern sentiments of love and happiness or our easy-out divorce culture.
At the same time, Jesus, as well as His contemporaries, all accepted the Mosaic Law’s four legally valid reasons for divorce. Jesus’ opinions about the “any cause” clause should not be misapplied; He was trying to prevent adultery, not entrap victims in harmful situations. Finally, we see Jesus express grace, even to the woman caught in the capital sin of adultery. Divorce reflects our brokenness and sinfulness. It is not unhealable and unforgivable. Perfect grace and truth collide in Jesus’ treatment of marriage and divorce. As a church community, we’re trying to hold onto both.
Resources:
- What About Divorce, an exegetical exposition from the Greek text by Spiros Zodhiates
- Divorce & Remarriage in the Church by David Instone-Brewer
- New Light on the Difficult Words of Jesus by David Bivin
[1] Pryor, Dwight A. New Light on the Difficult Words of Jesus. Holland, MI: En-Gedi Resource Center, 2007. (116-117).
[2] Daniel I. Bloc, “Marriage and Family in Ancient Israel,” in Marriage and Family in the Biblical World, ed. Ken M. Campbell (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity, 2003), 57,63; Davidson, Flame of Yahweh, 249; Gordon Wenham, “Family in the Pentateuch,” in Family in the Bible, ed. Richard S. Hess and Daniel Carrol (Grand Rapids: Baker Academic, 2003), 23-24; and Stuart, Exodus, 509-10.
[3] Instone-Brewer, David. Divorce and Remarriage in the Church: Biblical Solutions for Pastoral Realities. Downers Grove, Ill.: InterVarsity Press, 2003.
[4] “Divorce & Remarriage in the New Testament: Episode April 4, 2020,” Naked Bible Podcast, by Michael Heiser.
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